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Unplugging Day 4: Productivity

September 18, 2011 Leave a comment

I have seemed to have gotten through the hardest part, the first 3 days.  I still got up this morning and reached for my cell phone as usual but I went straight to CBC news application, remembering that I can’t get on Twitter, and spent 10 minutes looking at the morning headlines before getting up and heading on with my day.

We had an unfortunate incident with my cat early this morning involving a toxic plant and had to run her to the emergency clinic which involved a good 1.5 hours of waiting around and it wasn’t until we were on our way home that I realized I hadn’t pulled out my cell phone  the entire time we were waiting around the hospital.

I also noticed my productivity has spiked today, noticing a big difference in just 24 hours.  Yesterday I hadn’t thought that there was a real difference in what I would normally manage to get done and what I was getting done as I took other kinds of breaks instead of Facebook breaks. Today I realized that I don’t have Facebook and Twitter running in the background on my computer therefore  I am not distracted by people Facebook messaging me, or seeing 10 new Tweets on the Twitter tab. I spent more time working during work time, and no time on social media. As a result of this I am a head of schedule in almost all my reading for my classes, I finally finished a project I have been working on for what seems like forever, and I finished a good portion of  a book that one of my professors recommended to me.

I still maintain that I am a great multitasker, and am able to maintain a high GPA while being extensively involved with social media (perhaps a bit of denial on my part). However, I can’t argue that participating in social media doesn’t impact how much I get done and the amount of reading and rereading I could potentially get done. This is because it still takes time for me to answer people on Facebook when they message me, or go through those 10 tweets on Twitter before returning to the work I was previously engaged in.

While Twitter and Facebook might be a good mental break for 5-10 minutes when studying at school I think that I am going to have to strike a balance. Open it up for the 5 to 10 minutes and then close it again before going on with whatever activity I am working on.  Maybe by changing my social media habits I can be more productive and achieve my goals on time.

Yes, come Friday I may have to seriously evaluate how much access I let myself have to social media.  In the mean time I will continue on and try to get through the next 3 days in one piece, and in good mental health.

Unplugging Day 3: Detox

September 17, 2011 2 comments

As I end day 3 of my detox from Facebook and Twitter I’ve surrounded myself with supportive people and have heard all kinds of advice for getting through. Some useful, some not so useful. One of my friends suggested it must be like quitting smoking and to hang in there because it gets better after day 4. Another friend of mine told me to start using Google connect instead. This of course being the popular idea of trading one addiction for another that people often do. My father in law told me he would be my official sponsor, and also to wear mittens. And another person suggested chewing gum.

It’s interesting because my husband is doing this with me, as a way to support me, only he is having no issues at all, and frankly this makes me dislike him. Not because he is not having problems with it, but because it confirms my own addiction. I bring this up because he received an interesting email from Facebook and in the subject line he said it read “a reminder from Facebook: you haven’t logged on in a while.” How creepy is that? Facebook tracks your average use and when you are a way too long it sends you an auto email to remind you of all you are missing in the world. “Rob….where did you go Rob? Why don’t you like your friends anymore Rob? We miss you Rob. Come back to us Rob.” Yes, the more I think about it, the more it creeps me out. But not enough to keep me away.

I have classic symptoms of detox, and addiction: anxiousness, bitchiness, a short temper. I say I am having these issues because when my friends and family bring up Facebook or Twitter or say I have an addiction to it I get snappy and cranky with them. Today I still found myself reaching for my cell phone wanting to update my Facebook status, and see what other people are up to.

I find that my mind is wandering, wondering if I have been tagged in any horrible pictures, or if anyone is saying anything about me, and what messages might be in my inbox. It may seem extremely self involved but how can we not be when we are all so obsessed with an online world that is based on us. Look at Facebook for example (or Myspace if you still use that) both evolve around us. You make a profile all about you and we all get to feel important with our 587 ‘friends’ that are all, presumably, reading about our lives, half of whome we either: don’t know, don’t like, or are indifferent to.

I remember a few months ago I went to Chapters and the girl looking at books in the same aisle as I, was someone on my Facebook. We never exchanged a word the entire time. That day my Facebook ‘friend’ list fell from above 200 to below 80.

But even more then that, we feel as though we are loosing control. And I think that may be the scariest, and hardest part of it all. When in reality no one really cares about my Facebook, or is talking about me. Why? Because they are all too busy talking about themselves to talk about me and truthfully, I am not that important. No one is. This is the reality of Facebook. Me. Me. Me. Me. Me.

As sad as it may seem, I don’t really know what to do with myself. I’ve thrown myself into school work to try and keep busy, but I am not really doing anymore then I would normally. I still take breaks, only the difference is now I find myself with nothing to do on these breaks. I can’t just hop onto Facebook to see what everyone else is up to, I can’t hop on to Twitter and get the afternoons latest headlines, so instead I found myself having to go for a walk. Imagine that, I was actually forced to go outside!? I don’t think we realize how much we use these online communities in our everyday life. Whether it be a break from school work, a break from working, or just simply because we are bored. I often hear people say they eat when they are bored, well I Tweet when I am bored. It keeps my mind occupied, and allows me to interact with people who are like minded.

You may be reading this and thinking to yourself that I am one very sad individual, probably someone with no friends, perhaps little family, gets poor grades in school, and sits on MSN all day ( do people still use MSN?) but this is not the case. I have wonderful friends, and a great family, whom I love and see often. I do well in my classes, and complete my homework (eventually). I like to go out with people, I enjoy movies, and even the outdoors (camping as an example). But social media is so accessible that you can access it on a cell phone from anywhere. Hell, I can access my Facebook whilst I am camping at Red Streak camp ground in Radium which is up on a mountain. How ridiculous is that? Have you ever found yourself in a movie theater texting your friend? Or find yourself checking your Facebook while you are at dinner with someone? I bet at least some of you have done this. My husband had to make a rule for us ” No cell phones while we are eating.” I think a sign of addiction is when said activity starts getting in the way of other parts of your life?

“My name is Nicole, and I am addicted to social media.”

Man Sues Facebook

September 13, 2011 8 comments

The father of a 12 year old is suing Facebook because his daughter keeps creating accounts and posting sexually explicit photos of herself. In addition to that she was also posting personal information fbonline such as: her cell phone number, address, and school.  The girl was in the care of a voluntary care center. He is suing Facebook because he says that Facebook is not reinforcing it’s own age policy. The argument is being made that Facebook is creating an environment where  ”a risk of sexual and physical harm for the child” and is therefore being negligent.
The court papers say  that the father will “seek an injunction ordering Facebook to close down his daughter’s account and stop her from opening another one”. Furthermore the papers say that if that doesn’t happen, he “will seek an injunction to stop Facebook from operating in Northern Ireland”. Good luck to that, unrealistic much?

In a statement the father says “I was horrified when I saw the photographs my daughter had posted of herself on the site. She is far too young to understand what she is doing. She suffers problems and engages in self-destructive behavior. She is currently receiving counseling.”

So where does the responsibility belong? On the parents or on the social networking sites?

I think Facebook has some issues to work out, especially when it comes to privacy. But I don’t think that you can hold the company responsible if your child is acting irresponsibly on the internet. Call me crazy but is it not the responsibility of her father to ensure he knows what his child is doing? Am I the only one here that has a problem with this man? His lawyer argues An age check, like asking for a passport number, would be a simple measure for Facebook to implement.” First of all, Facebook doesn’t need my passport number or drivers license number. Second, what about those people who don’t have a passport number, or drivers license? And Third, we need to really examine how much responsibility Facebook should be taking on for the behaviours of your children.

This child obviously has other issues that need to be addressed, and her problem is not going to be solved because you find away from keeping her from accessing Facebook. She could upload those pictures online at other sites simply by putting in a fake birthday. Also, if she is 12 now I can only assume that she’ll be 13 within the next year and will be back at it with the same behaivour (since Facebook says you must be 13 years of age to sign up).  This child is posting sexual pictures of herself on the internet. Should we not be focusing on the why? Should her parents not be trying to stop her from doing this? If she is living at a care center why has her internet not been cut for her own protection? Why aren’t we asking all these questions?

Don’t get me wrong I understand that as a parent you can’t stop your child from doing everything especially in this technology enhanced world. Which is why I say if it weren’t Facebook it would be something else. This child clearly needs some help.  But parents need to take the responsibility in this age of technology to make their children understand about the dangers of online activity. It should be as normal as teaching a child not to take candy from a stranger, or to look both ways before crossing the street.

It’s interesting because over on babble.com parents with underage kids who had Facebook were criticizing a school principle who was calling for a ban on Facebook at schools and asking parents to take their children’s profiles down. Some of their responses were: “Get back to teaching”, “quit trying to usurp my authority”, “A school has no right to tell my child what he can and cannot do on his own time, in his own home.”  And “will you stand for the school telling you what video games and music your child is permitted to play at home?”   It would seem that there is infighting between parents, schools, and institutions about where responsibility lies.

My solution is you should all stop arguing with each other and protect your children, when you are teaching them about taking candy from strangers you should also be teaching them about the internet.  Education is the key, and getting your children help when they need it.

Woman Lives Without Money… for 15 years.

September 12, 2011 Leave a comment

I came across this story online while I was looking for something else. It’s not crime but I living without moneythink it’s completely worth blogging about. Heidemarie Schwermer, now 69, gave up using money 15 years ago and says she is happier  then she has ever been.

Before she gave up her money Schwermer worked as a teacher for 20 years but then went through a rough divorce.  After she went through that hard time she moved herself and two small children to Dortmund, Germany where she was taken aback by all the homelessness.  She wanted to help solve some of the problems so she opened up a shop called “Gib und Nimm” (Give and Take). The premises of the shop was to trade stuff and skills for other things and skills.  Her idea didn’t really pan out for the homeless as they often told her that a middle aged white women, such as herself, had no idea and could never relate to them.  What she did find was happening was that she was overwhelmed with the unemployed and retired needing to trade their skills for things.

After running the shop that way for a while she realized she was incredibly unhappy and was accumulating a lot of stuff, and junk.  In 1996 she sold everything she had and started to live out of her suitcase. Exchanging her skills for shelter, food, and clothing. “I am never short of food, clothing or friends and I have so much less stress in my life these days. I am not ruled by money, or bills, or greed. I just let go.”

Schwermer has since written two books on living without money but has her published pass on the money “I told them to give it to charity then it can make many people happy instead of just one.”

“I am even healthier. I’ve hardly seen a doctor in 15 years and I’m as fit as a fiddle. I don’t even worry about the future any more. I just live in the moment and enjoy every second,” she said.

The sociologist in me wants to say that she is using money it’s just a different type of currency.  Barter and exchange is not uncommon and is known as Reciprocity. Entire cultures base their economics off of an informal exchange of skills for goods and services.  Cultural Anthropologists would say that the Semai people are a good example of this. The Semai have a gift economy and everything they have works off of barter and exchange.

All that said. I think it’s incredible that she has been able to do that in the ‘industrialized world’ where the temptations of technology are all around us. Personally, I don’t know what I would do without my iPhone and Facebook.

3 year old Still Missing from BC -Update: Amber Alert Canceled

September 9, 2011 Leave a comment

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Three-year-old Kienan Hebert is still missing tonight after he went missing from his home Wednesday morning. Police suspect Randall Hopley, 46 of kidnapping the boy. Hopley has an intense criminal record that includes breaking and entering, and sexual assault and was just released from jail last week.

Today the RCMP have asked people in BC to start searching their vacant properties for any sign of forced entry. “See if there’s anything suspicious, any sign of break-ins, anything stolen,” RCMP told reporters . They are also asking business to review survelliance tape for any sign of either Kienan or Hopley “We ask that you review them.boy2 If you see something, and you believe you have images of the suspect or the vehicle, please contact police.”suspect

CTV reported today that volunteers were searching the woods by the families home for any sign of him today but have turned up nothing.

Kienan was last seen Tuesday Sept 6 when his parents tucked him in for the night in their home. Police are asking the public to watch for a brown 1987 Toyota Camry with B.C. licence plate 098 RAL. Hopley is white, 5-foot-10, 147 lbs., brown hair and hazel eyes. Please call 911 if you see the car, or either Kienan, or the suspect.

Update September 10, 2011: Amber Alert Extended to Alberta on a limited basis. Pictures will be displayed on Alberta highways this weekend and the public is still being asked to keep their eyes open for the pair.

Update: amber alert canceled! Herbert was dropped off around 3 am this morning say RCMP. More to come…

Call Sparwood RCMP with any information at 1-250-425-6233.

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